Sunday, December 28, 2008

Goodbye 2008!

Wow, another year come and gone. They do seem to be speeding up, don't they? But, I have to admit, I am ready for 2009. I'm ready to welcome in a new year and all of the possibilities it brings with it.

2008 was both exhilirating and exhausting. There were moments where I thought, "It doesn't get any better than this," but also many moments where I found myself really evaluating where I was going and what I was trying to do with my life. It had been a long time since I had set a long-term goal, so I was really caught off guard with both the elation and the let-down of having achieved it. Many people told me to just set another goal, to get on with it, but I really couldn't decide what I wanted to do. I didn't want to set a random goal just to have something to keep me busy - goals like that are so much harder to achieve because they are "outside" of you, your heart isn't really in them.

To complicate matters, I ended up with a minor achilles injury that I chose to ignore. You know how that goes - it then stays around like an unwanted houseguest, talking to you at the least opportune moments. I finally sucked it up, listened to my orthopedist(s), and quit running. Amazingly, it is getting better. I also got sick, had company in town, went out of town for the holidays, and had all the accompanying duties that go along with holiday preparation (is there more and more of it every year, or am I just making that up?). This last month has felt as long as the first eleven!

But the year is winding down, the holidays are over, I'm on the mend, and my head finally feels clear enough to think about future plans. It should be easy now, right? No. I'm still as befuddled as before. I just don't know what I want to do, or rather, how I should go about doing it. My fear of being a Desperate Housewife keeps me from being able to look at my life rationally and make decisions that are honest. For three years I was so focused on my running, I hardly had time to look up - and I loved every minute (okay, most minutes)! But do I want to do that again? Am I willing to make that type of commitment?

I know that I will never be happy sitting at home watching from the sidelines, but I don't know exactly what to focus on right now. The end of a year forces your focus off your own personal goals and keeps you busy with all the goings-on around you. But, with the coming of new year, it is time to take a breath, look around, look inside, and start anew.

Happy New Year!

1 comment:

Julie B said...

Happy New Year! I'm glad you are on the mend and feeling better. Cheers to 20091